Coaching Beyond The Toolkit

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He Is Not Mine

This beautiful dog is called Berty.

I have the joy, honour, and privilege of loving and living with Him.

I provide food, although He can find his own food.

I provide shelter and warmth, although He can do that himself too.

I make it easy for Him.

We share good times together.

He joins me in some of my human pursuits and I join in Him in his dog pursuits.

We hit it off with each other when He was a few weeks old. It was love at first bite.

We were already connected.

I paid someone money so that I could take care of HIM.

But I don’t own Him, anymore than He owns me.

He’s not mine.

He’s not a trophy, or a status symbol.

He is dog.

I am human.

We are both spirits of Nature, who hang out together.

We are one.

I am blessed.

I love him.

That IS all.

Love Life, Angela xx

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Clearing ~ by Martha Postlewaite

Do not try to save the whole world or do anything grandiose.

Instead, create a clearing in the dense forest of your life

and wait there patiently until the song that is yours alone to sing,

falls into your open cupped hands, and you recognise and greet it.

Only then will you know

how to give yourself to this world so worthy of rescue.

Love life, Angela xx

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Remembering King Harry

Everyone experiences loss and grief in their own way and it’s not a response we can predict.

I used to dread the day when Harry, my Golden Retriever would die. I imagined my heart would break into pieces and couldn’t imagine how I could ever live without him.

I imagined I would write a soul felt tribute to him, make a video, share all of his sporting achievements and rosettes.

I thought I’d get a paw print pendant made.

When the day I arrived, he left his wordly form peacefully.

Then came my tears…for a couple of days, weeks, months, and still now. But the tears were accompanied by the strangest, unexpected feeling.

Instead of feeling overwhelmed and consumed by grief, I felt enormous love, joy, and connection to everything.

Naturally I missed his physical presence.

Now there was a quiet space which used to be filled by the sound of him panting.

But joy?

Really?

I wasn’t expecting that.

I didn’t do any of the things I once thought I would.

I didn’t write a tribute – others paid tribute to him.

I didn’t have a pendant made.

None of the usual external comforts felt necessary.

And life carried on.

Like all dogs, Harry embraced and celebrated LIFE.

He revelled in the simplest of doggy pleasures…a tennis ball, a blade of grass, surfing the waves, a kind word.

That’s what he did in abundance. Naturally. Without question. Without overthinking it.

Singing the song that was his life.

I will treasure him and his memory for ever.

I love you and miss you Pots…

Angela x

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Of The Earth

Can you imagine, walking in Nature, and suddenly having a massive insight about how nature, animals, and ourselves are all connected?

Experiencing a feeling of oneness and seeing that everyone is whole and complete.

Seeing that we are not separate.

And that the wellbeing of one benefits the wellbeing others.

Time standing still.

Every step is ‘of the Earth’.

Realising that if more people understood this, there would be less suffering in the world and more love for life – in all its forms.

Because people protect what they love.

When you get quiet and connect with Nature, your soul starts to speak to you, with little nudges of ‘wouldn’t it be cool if…?

Are you listening?

Love life,

Angela xx

P.S Please share this post with anyone who would appreciate it.

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There’s Nothing To Do…

I know…that’s a kind of strange thing to say, especially as most people have a lot to do at this time of year, with more on their minds than usual.

And what a year, huh?

Back in 2019, I had an insight that ‘there’s nothing to do.’

Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t want to do NOTHING.

I’m not lazy.

Quite the opposite.

The problem was I wanted to do SOMETHING.

I wanted to come up with a new business idea.

So I did what anyone else would do.

I went outside, lay on the ground, and started to think hard about the answer.

Hoping I’d get an idea, an insight, or inspiration.

But nothing came…

My mind twisted and turned.

Still nothing.

I thought about asking someone for help.

But there was no-one around.

So I gave up and went for a walk.

And that’s when I realised …there’s nothing to do.

Here’s the thing…

When do you get your best ideas?

In the shower?

On a dog walk?

You don’t even know you’re having ideas.

They just come.

It’s natural.

And effortless.

Athletes perform well when they are in flow, present, and in the moment with very little on their minds.

There’s an ancient Chinese concept called Wu Wei which literally translates as ‘no trying’, or ‘no doing’.

It’s the dynamic, effortless state of mind of a person who is optimally effective.

It’s a high performance state of flow.

People in Wu-Wei feel relaxed and happy whilst also creating a brilliant work of art, competing at sport, or coming up with a brilliant idea.

I was taught to believe that the best way to achieve a meaningful life was through effort, working hard, striving, trying…

Achieve, achieve, achieve…

Turns out this is terrible advice.

Most of the states we really want – love, happiness, wisdom, creativity, insights – just happen all by themselves, ironically, when we stop striving.

In the words of Syd Banks:

“There’s nothing you need to do, be, have, change, get, or practice in order to be happy, loving, and whole.”

There’s nothing to do really is SOMETHING!

Love life,

Angela xx

P.S Please share.

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The Diamond, The Horse Sh*t, and The Nail Varnish

Despite all my years leading workshops, I still get nervous just before I meet a new group.

And it’s even more nerve racking when I’m sharing stuff I’m passionate about with people I already know.

But I know that the more I show up honestly and fully, the more I enjoy it.

Trouble is you just learn over your lifetime to hide and build layers of nail varnish or body armour to protect yourself.

I’m learning to live a new way these days and I’m enjoying sharing new stuff with people, despite the occasional colliewobbles.

I’ve shared the metaphor of The Diamond, The Horse Sh*t, and the Nail Varnish, with many clients. I first heard the story, in Kimberley Hare’s book, The Heart of Thriving.

Kim uses this metaphor to describe our True Nature – who we really are when we allow ourselves to show up fully in the world.

Imagine there’s a diamond deep inside all of us, which we’re born with.

This represents our true nature.

At your core you are a diamond…flawless, beautiful, strong, and resilient. And not just you. Every human being.

Sometimes the diamond gets covered and surrounded with horse sh*t.

This is our strories, our baggage, our self-created limitations, our ‘not good enough’ or insecure stories.

And then because we’re terrified that others will see the manure, we surround it with a thick layer of nail varnish.

This is the mask that we show to the world.

The armour we put on every day to be acceptable, to conform, to not stand out, to look pretty.

Actually, even sharing our crap (guided by wisdom) with others may be healthier than covering it up.

This is the true strength of vulnerability.

Regardless, the diamond is always there, and if we begin to peel off the nail varnish, most of the manure falls away on its own.

There’s nothing to keep it there.

And then you can just shine!

Showing up as your diamond changes everything.

This is not to be confused with what some people mean by when they talk about authenticity.

You see if you believe you are your story, your experiences, your human frailties and flaws, your history, your personality, and your feelings, it follows that you’re being authentic when you share these with others.

But what if you weren’t any of those things? I want to get to who you are at your core, before and beyond anything that’s been created by thought: pure consciousness, pure awareness, pure love.

Love life, Angela xx